Thursday, November 29, 2012

Signing Off....

This post has been a long time coming, and will be my last. I have had many opportunities to update you since my last post. Each time, I can't seem to think of anything to say. I feel like each situation I have come across, has not felt like a big deal. This in itself is a big deal, I know.

Mary has been tested and has been officially diagnosed as being Autistic, as well as intellectually disabled. Which means on top of the social issues that come with Autism, she has a very low IQ. There are more than a few descriptions of this, but the politically correct term is "intellectual disability". Still, this is nothing new, it just means we have the paperwork when we need it, for proof that she is entitled to every possible service available in the world, forever and ever.

Mary's new school is a wonderful fit for her. There is horseback riding on Monday, Martial Arts on Tues. and Thurs, which is a self defense/therapy type thing. And, she gets to go to either the YMCA or a local pizza place each week for job skills training. All of which she loves, except maybe for shoveling horse poop at the stables. There is also the opportunity to go to the Special Olympics, play sports, music therapy, occupational therapy, and most of all, 2 behavior therapists on campus, full time.

Every time I thought to post was because of some injustice I felt Mary was subjected to at school. Each time, I thought it through and realized I had a pattern of thinking everybody was out to get her, and nobody understood her but me. With the help of the behaviorists, as well as numerous family members, I began to accept that I have been coddling Mary. When I was told to put her on the same level as my other kids, I began to see things differently. I have always let her get away with certain behaviors, mostly being rude and disrespectful to myself and her siblings, because I thought she didn't understand. I was wrong, and created a monster! The beauty of private school versus public, is that the staff is not afraid to tell you like it is!

So now, things happen, and I just don't stress over them. I think I also got tired of hearing myself complain. Even when I talk to people, I always bring her up in conversation, sometimes I can't stop myself, and know I ramble on about her. I'm trying to stop that. I love Mary, and there will always be something special about her, but aside from a few quirks, she is no different than my other 3 children. There is so much more to my life. It is wonderful, I am so blessed with a wonderful family. My children are happy, healthy and kind to each other. My days are filled more with laughter, than concern or sadness. Blogging was a wonderful outlet for me, it got me through so much. Being able to write about my struggles helped me to see them more clearly, and to realize that it's really not that bad. Maybe I'll start a new blog, something more upbeat, because even still, there is never a dull moment in the Murphy house!


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