This week has been tough. My oldest daughter Sarah experienced the death of a good friend. Sarah's friend has a little sister a couple of years younger than Mary. They had gotten together on a couple of occasions to take their little sisters to the movies,or to spend a little time together. Mary doesn't really remember, but she was sad and asked if she should say a prayer.
I knew if I let her think about it too much, she would start to cry. I could see by the look on her face that she was deciding how or who, she should feel sad for. She knows that death is sad, but I think knowing that her sister was hurting bothered her more. Mary asked me if he had a job, I told her that he did. After some thought, she stated that they were now going to have to find someone to take his place at work. I didn't know if I should laugh or cry at her observation.
It amazes me how her mind works sometimes. How at times there is no sense in what she says, and at other times, she can be the only one in the room making sense. I found a really good website that gave me some insight into talking to Mary about death, http://http://www.griefspeaks.com/id27.html. It's funny how many things I have not bothered to talk to her about because I figured she wouldn't understand.
I knew if I let her think about it too much, she would start to cry. I could see by the look on her face that she was deciding how or who, she should feel sad for. She knows that death is sad, but I think knowing that her sister was hurting bothered her more. Mary asked me if he had a job, I told her that he did. After some thought, she stated that they were now going to have to find someone to take his place at work. I didn't know if I should laugh or cry at her observation.
It amazes me how her mind works sometimes. How at times there is no sense in what she says, and at other times, she can be the only one in the room making sense. I found a really good website that gave me some insight into talking to Mary about death, http://http://www.griefspeaks.com/id27.html. It's funny how many things I have not bothered to talk to her about because I figured she wouldn't understand.
I have a friend who often says that we should all be lucky enough to live in Mary's world. I think she meant that because Mary seems oblivious to a lot that's going on. I believe Mary's world is so much more. Not only is she not oblivious, she is thinking about way more than we would. So yes, Mary's world would be a wonderful place to be.
2 comments:
Such a sad thing, but even worse when you see his picture. I think Mary is more aware of things than many people think. She just looks at things differently, like from behind and at an angle, when the rest of us look at it head-on.
I agree with Sandy, it is very sad, and it's hard to know exactly what she is feeling about all this. I think she is probably feeling all the same things, just in a very different way.
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