Separation Anxiety

I have been bugging my husband to take me on a trip, one that he has planned himself, that doesn't involve visiting family, or going anywhere we have already been. I particularly wanted to see the coast of Maine in the Fall. Well, I got my wish, we leave in the morning for 4 days in Maine. I am so excited, so why have I been tossing and turning the last few nights? That's right, Mary. Mary has been exhibiting a bit of anxiety, knowing we are going to be gone, which she usually does. I also have a little anxiety over leaving her. For some reason, this time feels different. It actually feels like a physical pain, almost to a point that I don't want to leave her. Honestly, as much as I want to go, if for some reason our trip had to be cancelled, I would be o.k with it.

I think it's because I feel like there is so much going on right now. Mary does not have school on Friday, so I know I don't have anything to worry there. We have just started a whole new acne regimen, one I am really hoping works. We saw a new dermatologist, and he immediately said she needed antibiotics. So with that, a new topical treatment and face wash, we've got quite the routine. It's funny how all the testing, medically, academically, and socially, I know not to get hopeful, and feel like I can take any result. This however, has got me really hopeful. I want her face to clear so badly. Maybe I'm afraid it's going to clear up while I'm gone and I'm going to miss it? Nah, I don't think so, although it would be nice, I don't think it works that quickly.

I always miss Mary when I am away from her. I can't remember the last time I felt like I needed a break from her, although I know we both need a break from each other every now and then. When she was little, my husband and I would take turns doing for her, since she has developed, it's just been me for a long time now. Sure there are still things he can help with, but I just do automatically, and so does Mary. I also am the one with the patience. I have never been a patient person, but with Mary, I am. Leaving this time makes me feel like a piece of me will be missing.
I am not expecting much sleep tonight either, hopefully I can catch some z's on the plane. Mary will miss me, but as long as she knows I will bring her home something, she will be alright.